In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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