Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
