Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
