I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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