I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
