every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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