Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize