Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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