my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
