I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
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Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
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I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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