So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
