Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
There's always time for handjobs
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
