im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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