Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize