I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
