Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize