Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
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Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
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BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
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