Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize