I'm eating all of the evidence.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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