At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
