She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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