I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
