Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
