Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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