Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
