i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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