her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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