i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
