Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
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