I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Randomize