oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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