More tranny stories later!
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
