Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
