Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize