Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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