Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize