Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize