How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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