4 words: hood of his car
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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