i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
