Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
