Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize