you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
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Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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