I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
