In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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