You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize