I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
