i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
