There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
