I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize