Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize